communications

Dear self,

After weeks of silent truce following long emotional e-mails bouncing back and forth, I've had enough, and had to bring it up for a face to face discussion. All the pent up emotions are bubbling on the surface and replaying parts of it again and again on my mind like a broken record is not helping. People think and as do I, I think about everything and anything related.

I'm not sure what a proper discussion and communication entails, but I hope this help it a bit. For the both of us.

Apologies and promises comes up. But things takes time, personality and character do not take lightly to being tuned, as do I. Making promises to deliver the moon makes my heart drop a beat. One cannot promise to change a personality overnight. But I cannot refuse a promise that is made so sincerely.

 It's not like I was the one who's always right and perfect, I'm definitely far from it. This has taught me to learn tolerance. Whether I'm a good enough student for that subject remains a question.

Why did I bring myself to put me lower on the priority list. I regret using the words I use. My brains never quite seem to think as fast as my mouth does, this terrible habit of mine has been pointed out by my parents time and time again.

Dear self, you idiot.

Perhaps it's for the better, I know I would never find it in myself to spend a lifetime with someone who does not have me in their priority. Certainly not ever.